I remember my first BlogHer conference: BlogHer '10 in New York City. I meticulously unpacked my suitcase with the outfits I felt might portray me as I wanted people to see me.

And then I kind of hid in my hotel room.

Image: Angela Reinosa on Unsplash

Despite blogging for nine years at that point and experiencing what I considered a measure of success, I walked into the dining hall and suddenly felt very small. Like tiny. Inconsequential. A fraud.

I felt like an impostor in a room full of people who knew what to do and how do it well.

Turns out I wasn't really alone in that feeling, though. It's a running fear of many bloggers attending a conference like #BlogHer16. Impostor Syndrome settles into the pit of their stomachs, and suddenly they're left doubting every word written, every social media post, every picture shared.

I'm here to tell you this: You don't have to feel that way.

Your blog is valid. Your experience is valid. Your measure of success is valid. You are valid.

Of course, I can tell you that until the cows come home, and you still might not believe me. So here are five things to tell yourself if you suddenly feel out-of-place at #BlogHer16.

Success Is Individual

Before arriving, and then all during the conference, tell yourself that success is individual. What you view as success may differ from what someone else uses to quantify or qualify their own success.

Take some time prior to the conference to detail what you view as a success for your experience. Is it simply pressing publish on difficult pieces? Is it hitting a number of views per month? Is it connecting with brands? Is it having your words published on big media sites or in print? Is it connecting with others and hearing the life-altering "me, too" from others in your tribe? Figure out what it is and remind yourself regularly that your success is your own.

Comparison Is the Thief of Joy

Yes, Theodore Roosevelt said it years ago, but it still rings true today. If you forget that success is individual and you start comparing yourself to other people at #BlogHer16, you might end up feeling less than. You might start doubting yourself.

You'll end up in a spiral of negative emotions that you don't really need to entertain. When the thoughts of "her site is so big," or "she has so many Twitter followers," or "I'll never have the same type of engagement as him" start creeping in, immediately shut those voices down. Go back to your own success.

Someone Else's Success Doesn't Negate Your Own

"That should have been me." We've all thought it about someone or something at one time or another. I urge you to stop that type of thinking right now. Not only is it engaging in comparison and forgetting about your individual success, it's kind of ugly.

You can legitimately feel proud of someone's accomplishment without mentally going down a trail of "could have, should have, what if" self-loathing. I promise. Once you learn to let go of those destructive thoughts and celebrate colleagues' successes, you'll feel more positive about achieving your own list of goals.

Acknowledge We're All a Work in Progress

Don't compare your beginning to someone else's middle. You started at x-point, just like everyone else. If someone else is farther along in their journey, either chronologically or goal-wise, the comparison (which you shouldn't be making in the first place; see point two) is like comparing an apple seed to an apple pie.

You've got to plant the seed to get the tree to yield the fruit to pick the fruit to make the pie. We're all at different points on our path.

You're fine where you are right now in this moment. Yes, you have goals. You're making plans to achieve them. That's powerful in and of itself.

But that blogger or social media star whom you assume already has all the apple pie might feel as though she's still in the yielding-fruit phase. We're all works in progress, all apple pies in the making. Let progress happen.

You Are Not Alone

If you get Impostor Syndrome and feel like you don't belong at the conference, reach out to someone. Someone brand-new. A blogger you respect who is also in attendance. The person sitting next to you at lunch. Anyone.

Tell them your thoughts. Ask how they deal with similar ones. When you do, you'll not only realize you're not alone in these fears, but you'll create a connection. Connection is the be-all and end-all of banishing Impostor Syndrome.

Once you realize that everyone deals with this in their own way, you'll feel like you belong. Because you do. You belong here. Every last one of you.

If you get Imposter Syndrome at #BlogHer16, feel free to seek me out. I'm most often found near air-conditioning vents, pondering if the sweat on my upper lip makes me look like I'm glistening or like I should be avoided due to potential stink issues. Oh, and I'll be wearing green. I look forward to meeting you and learning more about what it is that makes you tick.

Join us every Friday in July on Twitter from 12-1 CT with the hashtag #BlogHerU!

Jenna Hatfield (@FireMom) is the Online Awareness and Engagement Manager for Postpartum Progress, a non-profit focused on maternal mental health. She blogs about adoption, parenting, mental health, marathon training, and life in general at Stop, Drop and Blog.